Monday, July 1, 2013

Just Spanking

Something became very clear to me during the Texas All-State Spanking party that I attended in June.  I've always known that I didn't particularly care for "just spanking", but what came to light is the fact that if I am being 'just spanked', with no scolding or discipline dynamic, I get MAD.  Mad at myself for consenting to it and mad at the Top for doing it to me.  

I would define "just spanking" as being struck on the bottom with no scolding or discipline dynamic, simply because one enjoys the sensation, pain, or connection.  What is termed 'fun' spankings would be in this category as well.  I don't enjoy these things at all, in fact I hate it, so I definitely don't see it as fun.

Does this mean that I'm not a spanko?  I don't know...maybe.  I guess you could say that what I have is really a discipline fetish and not necessarily a pure spanking fetish.  I'm always fantasizing about being disciplined in some way:  scolding, lecturing, spanking, writing lines or essays or being grounded.  This can be real discipline or 'funishment' long as there is some sort of reason.  Don't let one of these things happen in real life because I will obsessively think about it and replay it in my mind endlessly.  Occasionally my psychiatrist will lecture me and boy do I eat that up.  

I'm not really sure why discipline makes a spanking more bearable to me, it just does.  I suppose it may be due to the headspace it puts me into.  I'm getting it for my own good, to make me a better person, etc.  I think it's also the feeling that I'm being loved and cared for.

Moving forward I will not bottom to somebody who just spanks.  If that is your style of spanking I won't bottom to you.  It's not fair to myself and it wouldn't be fair to the Top either because (mostly) all Tops want their spankee to enjoy the scene just as much as they are.  I know this greatly limits the amount of play and play partners that I have, which does suck.  But it's for the best.  


  1. you got to do what makes you happy & you are a spanko you just like the discpline side and thats cool to. Just stay true to yourself

  2. "I'm getting it for my own good, to make me a better person, etc. I think it's also the feeling that I'm being loved and cared for." That makes total sense to me. I don't think it makes you any less of a spanko. It's good to know what you want.

  3. I agree with your thoughts , As a Spanker/Top I have always felt that a scolding was needed in the very least to make sure the punished lil lady understands why . Its as important as the after care. I have spanked while scolding , and then finished the scolding while the naughty girl is in the corner bare bottomed and crying . Just a "spanking" for spanking sake seems very clinical . However I am sure there are many who prefer that . To each his own

  4. I can understand your feelings. I think there are two definitions of spanking, and they should be recognized as being separate things. Both kinds involve striking the buttocks. When you're growing up, as a child, you learn about the first definition. Spankings are given because someone needs to be punished. Sometime later, you learn another definition. Spanking can be a playful activity for fun or erotic purposes. A person can be attracted to either kind of spanking, or both. Personally, I am only drawn to the first kind I learned as a child. Discipline is what gives spanking the meaning that is important to me. My fetish is discipline, with spanking being the method of discipline required to make it fulfilling. The play kind is not something that interests me.

  5. Same here. The whole dynamic changes if there is a reason for a spanking. I enjoy being punished or punishing, therefore there needs to be reason, even if it is completely made up. I don't even enjoy spanking only without any context as a top much, if at all...

  6. I know this is an old thread.....but....

    For me, just getting smacked on the buttocks, with anything from hand to cane, would be simply painful and annoying.

    The context of being punished for my naughtiness, new or old is what I crave. I love admitting my misdeeds, if only after being caught, being lectured and then submitting, indeed cooperating in my punishment, which is always a bare-bottom spanking.